Posts Tagged “Fair Weather”

Ah, Tool. A band that is totally outside of any industry standards or trends. A band that has produced four albums over their twenty year existence of high quality music filled with great lyrics, instrumentals, album packaging, the whole deal. The band reeks of consistency. The band also has one of the all time most annoying fan bases, and the biggest discrepancy between quality of music and quality of fan. The fact of the matter is that a majority of Tool fans resemble the baaaing sheep they supposedly despise.

Just to clarify, I think Tool is a great band. I first heard the band when I was a freshman in high and I heard a track on the radio, and then after googling the lyrics (which completely disturbed my 14 year-old-mind), I was hooked from there. And while, like with all bands, my attention or favor towards the band has wavered up and down since then, I have always felt and will always feel that they’re a truly talented progressive metal band. I even have a poster of the Tool dick tool at left above my bed. There is no debate that I do very much enjoy the band, and I don’t have some bizarre vendetta against the band for selling too many records or something.

That being said, so many of their hardcore fans are garbage, and not in the sense that they’re not loyal enough or they’re fair weather fans. I mean that they’re too loyal, and they give way, way too much credit to the band. A quick glance through Tool’s last.fm page reveals this.

Yes, many Tool fans believe that the band is insanely smart and are running around with IQs above 200 and that their music is some sort of embodiment of this high level intelligence. Granted, Maynard writes good lyrics, but please. Half of their music can be directly tied to drug use (a completely separate topic I have absolutely no interest in discussing), and even their guitarist has noted the benefits of DMT on his life. So, is Tool smart? Maybe. Does Tool have some higher level understanding of life and existence? No.

Then there’s the outright worship of the band. Last June I was at the final Isis concert in Hollywood before their break up (yes, I’m cool). Up in the sealed off area on the second floor where the band and their guests were hanging out, there was a guy with shoulder length brown hair that looked quite a bit like Adam Jones, the guitarist. However, any doubt that it was him was erased when the guy standing next to me with a tattoo on his shoulder of the third eye looked up and then literally started bowing down to him. He then turned to me and yelled “that’s Adam fucking Jones!” The literal worship was bizarre to me. From the tattoo to the actual bowing, it’s incredibly strange. And off base. Adam is a great guitarist, but does anyone really deserve to be bowed down towards?

Of course no discussion of Tool worship can go without at least touching on the complete and totalĀ reverenceĀ for vocalist Maynard James Keenan. This idea that Maynard is some sort of prophet is a theme that is pretty constant amongst the irritating Tool fan base. As said earlier, Maynard writes good lyrics. But that’s pretty much it. The rest of his time is spent making wine and participating in sub par side projects like Puscifer.

Really, it’s all just so overblown. There’s the Fibonacci sequence track listing for Lateralus, the constantly commented on five year gap between between Tool albums and how mathematically it is supposed to somehow guarantee or ensure a new record this year. This constant clinging to the idolized versions of the band members and the higher power that dictates their music and album release dates and secret tracks really wears down on the image of Tool as a band. And while by no means does it ruin the actual music, it does have an impact on the perception of the band by both good fans and prospective fans. There is a negative impact when quality, grounded fans have to defend the work of a band due to the ignorance and idiocy of the majority of the fan base. In the end it’s summed up best by the post below, and I left their username visible so everyone can go to their page to congratulate them on their intelligence.

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